Dealing with infidelity by a partner is not easy. Feelings of betrayal and abandonment will arise within you. Not a few people who even blame themselves for infidelity committed by their partner.
“Feeling and starting to think that he is not so worthy and can not give happiness to his partner,” said a psychologist.
“Of course you will cry, be disappointed and angry. But reducing your emotions when talking to a cheating partner, being calm, can make your partner wonder why you are not angry,”
Psychologists say, infidelity can occur because of the desire to fight challenges and do something unnatural. When you find your partner doesn’t get emotional and instead is calm, feelings of guilt from the perpetrator can just appear.
Apart from that, here are some things you can also do to deal with infidelity.
1. Don’t Take Revenge
Maybe you are thinking of repaying the affair with another affair. But according to Reader’s Digest, this is not a good move and actually lowers self-esteem.
2. Don’t Hurt Yourself
You may feel sad, betrayed, to feel the world is collapsing because of your partner’s infidelity. What should be remembered, your world is not only centered on him, there are many things that can be done besides lamenting the behavior of your partner. Try to rise from adversity and show that you can stand up and continue a better life without them.
3. Do Not Involve Children
When the marriage has been blessed with children but the spouse is still having an affair, never involve the child in the case that is happening. The situation should remain between you and your partner.
“Otherwise, it puts kids in a bind where they may feel like they have to choose between the two of you,” says Jane Greer, a New York-based relationship expert, as quoted by Reader’s Digest.
New York-based relationship and etiquette expert April Masini adds that it is important to convey information to children on an as-needed basis and ensure that they know that you will all survive this situation.
“They may know you’re disappointed, but they really need to know they’re not going to lose you,” Masini says, no matter how old they are.
4. Don’t Ignore Infidelity
Maybe you’re thinking of maintaining your marriage by ignoring your partner’s infidelity. Never do this. The reason is, maintaining a relationship by letting what has happened is not solving the problem. But only postponing it as a pile of problems.
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